How to play with our children without dominating or being dominated by them

How to play with our children without dominating or being dominated by them

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Play like children. Sounds good, right? However, it is not as idyllic as it sounds. Raise your hand The one who has never felt real laziness when playing with his children. Many times, because children, of course, use play as learning. And at the beginning they are not prepared neither to win, nor to lose nor to accept certain rules. The result? Everything may start well, but as time goes by, things get complicated: the child refuses to lose; The father refuses to lose; The child gets tired and wants to leave the game halfway; The father tries to compete and catches up with the child ... And what was going to be a wonderful afternoon of laughter and complicity, turns into a pitched battle. A disaster, wow.

Therefore, these tips will come in handy when sitting down to play Monopoly with your child. Or for when he asks you to show how many jumps you are capable of roping. You are ready? Here are some tips to play with our children without dominating or being dominated by them.

The basic premise from which we must start is the following: playing is fun. For everyone who plays. It does not matter if they are children than adults. If someone is not having fun, something is wrong. Good. Once we understand this, we must do everything possible to find fun when playing with our child. The fun is spoiled when one of the two tries to dominate the other. It also happens among children. Have you ever noticed that fighting in a group of children begins when one accuses another of being 'a bossy' who tries to dominate the rest?

If you want to avoid that the game with your child ends in a pitched battle, write down these tips to play with our children without dominating or being dominated:

1. Don't let your child bully you: No threats. Many children love to play with their parents because they know that it is the ideal time to 'bully' them. As it is a game ... they will not scold them. So they take the opportunity to threaten their parents: 'But you're not looking at me! Look at me or you don't play anymore! '

2. Don't let your child think you are his servant: Look how they like to have their parents at their service. So many children, when it comes time to pick up, decide that they are their parents, that they have other things to do. No, you are not his servant. Remember it.

3. You decide how many times you want to repeat the game: Children love to repeat and repeat a game ad nauseam. Above all, because it is true that they learn many things thanks to that repetition. But for parents it can be torture. If you are already tired of playing with your child to sink the fleet, you better suggest another game.

4. Protest if you need to: What is that to keep silent before a rule that your son did not respect? If you have to tell them, you tell them. In fact, that is also a valuable lesson for children while they play. The game is not immune from respecting a series of rules and limits. And much less it is when respecting parents.

5. Learn to negotiate with them: There are ways and means to express a dislike. Nor is it a question of becoming the tyrant and dominator of the game. If you don't want to play rope anymore, suggest another game that your child might like. Between the two of you, you will reach an agreement.

6. Don't compete with your child: Many parents are suddenly imbued with a kind of deja vu and begin to behave like children, and to compete at the same level as their children. They get angry if they lose, kick and even explode into a 'well I don't play anymore'. Never lose sight of who you are and where you are.

7. Don't steal your child's game: How many parents volunteer to help their kid ride the lego Millennium Falcon and they end up doing it themselves? They get so excited, have so much fun with the game, that they forget their child should do it. It happens to many fathers and mothers, yes, and the worst thing is that they do not realize that in this way they 'steal' their child's game. He will not learn and you, yes, you will have a good time.

8. Remember that the game, for him, is also learning: Do not forget that for you it is fun, but for him it is also learning, so enhance all those skills that you know he can acquire through that game, and do not hesitate to explain to your child what benefits that particular game brings him. For example, while playing checkerboard with him, you say, 'Hey, do you know chess is very good for memory ...?'

9. Don't forget to praise him: Since you know that your child learns through play, you can take advantage of it to improve his self-esteem by praising some of his progress from time to time. 'Woof! If you have done 50 rope jumps! How good it turns out! '

10. Take advantage of the game to strengthen the bond: Nothing better than the game to strengthen the bond with your child. You share with him laughs, problems, anger ... Learn and learn with him. But above all, the game helps you to get to know each other more and better.

In the end, the most valuable thing is common sense. When you play with your child, enjoy, have fun, but see if he has fun too. For both of them it must be the best moment.

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