How to explain the loss of a loved one to children

How to explain the loss of a loved one to children

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One fine day they told me that he was no longer with us, that Grandfather was gone forever and that now he was in a better place. I still remember the integrity of my mother telling me with a broken voice, due to the lump in her throat, that we would never see him again. Never more. Why? That heartbreaking news struck me because of its definitive nature. Now years later I think ... how to explain the loss of a loved one to children?

Until then, the word 'never' did not exist, as such, in my understanding. Most of the events around me happened temporarily, but the idea of ​​"forever" had to mature for some time. He was only seven years old.

After the initial nasty surprise longing came. Even though I didn't see my grandparents every day, I always looked forward to the weekends. And the following were no longer fun. My grandmother began to wear black and my mother was serious, sad and not wanting anything for several months.

Reliving this moment of my life, I hope that many years will pass before as a mother I have to explain death to my children, as a natural event, which we all have to face at some point in our lives. Being prepared to do it right is important and, although I do not like to think about death, it is good to raise awareness to know how to act when the time comes. These are the testimonies that have reached us on our Facebook page, from all the people who have written to us telling us how they did it.

"Many people can learn from your example and, therefore, I would like to encourage you to continue." This is the case of Romina, a mother who had to explain the death of her aunt to her 5-year-old son and went to a psychologist. "He told me that first I had to overcome it and be strong to be able to tell him, otherwise my son would see me badly and he was going to try to console me, repressing his feelings so as not to see me badly. It was the best advice I ever received ".

Sandra came up with a story to justify to her 3-year-old son the loss of a one and a half year old cousin. In keeping with his religious ideas, he told her that "He had gone to heaven and was now a little angel. I didn't let him come in to see it because I wanted him to keep the memory of having played with him. "

Alejandra believes that "it is very sad and painful to find the right words to tell a child that a loved one is not coming back" and Gema wishes it would still be a long time before she had to talk to her 4-year-old son about this issue because "It was already difficult for him to understand why there was a dead bird near the fence of their schoolyard. "Ela and Cristina consider that" it is better to tell the truth, without doing dramas "and Luz argues that" it is better to be honest with them to give them an example and trust. "

Thank you all for your words of encouragement. Finding the hope of moving on is the key to overcoming the loss of a loved one. Helping others when they need it most is the best gift we can give them. Tell your children, life is the best we have. Enjoy the moment.

Marisol New.

You can read more articles similar to How to explain the loss of a loved one to children, in the category of Death on site.

Video: Till We Meet Again, A childrens book about death and grieving (August 2022).