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Why should we not pressure children

Why should we not pressure children



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All parents seek the happiness of their children and for this, they seek that they excel in what they do. To achieve this, many adults are convinced that their children will perform better if are demanding with them and pressure them to make an effort and do things better.

Parents have to ensure that the child reaches a balance in the emotional, physical and academic so that there is no risk that the pressure exerted on the children may have unexpected consequences. Why do parents often pressure their children and what are the consequences?

Most parents who are demanding tend to be demanding in everything their children do: in sports, in school, in housework, etc. The requirement and perfection are the philosophy by which the family is governed. It is perfection as a way of life.

Other times, parental pressure on their children comes from the high expectations and high goals that adults set for their children. The individual characteristics and rhythms of each child are not taken into account and parents demand of the little ones as if they demanded themselves.

The educational style also plays a role. Demanding parents often apply the authoritarian educational style where they are uncompromising and try to control everything their children do to achieve goals. When parents go overboard, it can lead to child dependency.

There are many families that put pressure on their children, especially in academic matters, and doing so carries negative consequences that affect the little ones.

- Makes children more introverted and insecure. The pressure exerted by parents causes children to move away from them little by little. Children begin to think that they are not important enough to their parents unless they are perfect, something few children can achieve. Continually demanding can lead to wrong messages.

- Children with stress. Stress is generated by the high expectations of parents and this has a negative effect that leads to behavior problems in children and chronic stress. This stress can bring with it: outbursts of anger, depression, wanting to be alone, stomach aches, etc.

- Children constantly angry. Making the child understand that everything he does needs correction can make him feel ashamed and if this happens continuously this feeling turns into resentment.

- They have low self-esteem. The lack of recognition of their achievements means that there is a lack of autonomy and motivation and this leads to a bad image of themselves.

Parents have to stop and think if they are too demanding with their children. Realizing is the first thing that must happen to change. Once this has been achieved, it is important to find moments to reflect and check if the goals that are proposed to the children are appropriate. Some tips for demanding children without pushing:

- Children are not adults. Although the child appears an early intellectual maturity, it must be taken into account that he is still a child when establishing the levels of demand.

- Give affection. The key is that children feel support, feel valued and not just demanded.

- Shared moments. It is important to find moments to have fun together, talk, laugh and that the conversations are not only to let the child know how to behave.

- That children are autonomous. Instead of controlling everything they do, give them autonomy and let them make decisions

You can read more articles similar to Why should we not pressure children, in the category of Conduct on site.


Video: Οι λύσεις όταν το παιδί δεν τρώει το φαγητό του. Κική Τζωρτζακάκη (August 2022).